Anxiety & Depression: It's Okay to Have a Bad Day

Call me a slow learner, but I had a realization the other day. I was struggling a little bit the other day and, of course, I was feeling guilty that I was feeling a bit down. Then, I thought to myself, "It's okay to be sad sometimes." This isn't an excuse to look at the glass half-empty, or to be a grump, but it is okay if you have a day you don't feel exactly like yourself. Everyone has days when they are excited to go to bed so they can forget about today and start with a fresh tomorrow. When you are feeling down, try to not feel guilty about it, and look forward to the many good days to come.

Facebook and Anxiety

As I have lived with anxiety and depression, there have been times I refuse to log onto Facebook. Why? Because there are some people who portray their lives as being perfect and flawless. At a certain point in my life, I felt like my life was falling apart. Seeing posts and pictures of others that seemed too good to be true, was very hard. I wondered, "What is wrong with me?"

Life is good, and I'm not saying we shouldn't portray that. I'm just saying that we shouldn't use social media as a way to make others jealous of us. I honestly cringe when I read posts when people boast about having things that other people yearn for. What are some of those things? A healthy relationship (#mysignificantotherissoooohot), a skinny body (#ionlyeatvegetablesandwouldntevenlookatatwinkie), a clean house (#ibetyourlivingroomdoesntlookthisgood), good looks (#lovetobebeautiful), etc.

I am not criticizing people for being in love, being healthy, or for being grateful for their blessings. What does bother me is the lack of thinking of who is reading these things. How many single people are there out there who would love to have a significant other? How many people struggle with their weight and are reminded of that through Facebook? How many people think something is wrong with them because their lives aren't as "perfect" as their friends' lives are portrayed.

I also ache because of the lack of privacy. Some of the things people post I feel should be said in private conversations, not put on the internet. Why not enjoy the things in life without feeling we need to post every single one so people know how awesome we are? Facebook is a wonderful way to keep in touch with family and friends, but there are some things that should be saved for the privacy of the home.

Honestly, I enjoy being on Facebook. I love seeing what people are up to and keeping in touch with people I wouldn't see otherwise. I just hope that people will think before they post. We can ask, "Why am I posting this?" Is it to make others jealous? Is it to prove something? If the answer to these or similar question is yes, I hope that we can post something that can uplift others, not make them look at their life and think, "Man, I stink compared to them."

I guess the thought I would like to leave is, "How are the things I am posting on Facebook affecting other people?"

This reminded me about a "Live Without Pretending" challenge read about it here.

(Also, I pray you don't find me rude for posting my thoughts. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion and it is okay if you don't agree with me! I would love to hear your thoughts in the comments. When I thought about not posting this, I remembered Sara Bareilles's song, "Brave" :) )

Live Without Pretending

I wish I could take credit for this cute graphic, but I must give props to one of my favorite shows, Studio5. On this local morning show, they had this theme for the month of February, "Live Without Pretending." Their challenge to everyone was to truly embrace your life, imperfections and all. They encouraged people to even post pictures of things they would normally hide such as eating an entire carton of ice cream, what they look like without make-up on or hair done, or a messy room in their home. I feel the goal of it was to help us connect better with other people. None of us are perfect, so why do we sometimes try to pretend we are? 

While I don't think we should tell everyone about all of our imperfections and flaws, I think it is important to be genuine and real with people. It makes you much more personable and it can help create friendships that will last a lifetime.

The other day, I forgot a sweet woman from my church was coming over in the morning to kind of give me a run-down on the new class I am teaching. When I let her in, I was mortified. My house was literally a disaster. This was just after I found out I had celiac disease, so almost all of the contents of my pantry were all over the kitchen as I was figuring out what I could and couldn't eat. Since the kitchen was such a mess, we hadn't worried too much about straightening up the night before because I knew I was going to tackle all of it in the morning. So, seriously, my house was SCARY. I tried to explain to my friend why my house was so horridly messy and kept apologizing. Finally, she said, "Chelsea, seriously don't worry about. It is just fine." The funny thing was I really believed her. I didn't feel she was judging me or thinking I was a horrible housekeeper. She was being real with me. Her house has likely been extremely messy before, and she understood. Even though it was embarrassing, I am happy I had this experience. It helped me to be more real.

One of my ways of trying to live without pretending is to write on this blog. I hope sharing my experiences  with depression and anxiety can help other people. The more we talk, the more we can relate. The more we can relate the richer our friendships and lives will become.