Our BRIGHT Blue Wall...Continued: Yes, that is a Princess Castle in my Interior Decorating

When Jordan asked me what I wanted for my graduation present, I showed him this: 

Doesn't that look magical!? I love toys. Seriously. I thought I would grow out of Toys R Us and the Disney store around age...I don't know...10? 14? 16? Well, I still haven't grown out of it folks.

Well, Jordan has gotten used to my silly wishes, and he got it for me. After I had SO much fun building it, I didn't want to just stick it in a closet or something. So, it has been incorporated into our decor. Yes. In the front room against the bright blue wall. It's totally awesome.

It is on a small shelf that we keep our Blu-ray player and such on. It used to be black, but I painted it white. (I know, it was a little scary). On the other side of the shelf top is this:

Yes, that is a jar of sprinkles. Why? I love sprinkles. They are colorful and happy.

I got the America "My Home Sweet Home" sign from Hobby Lobby. I loved it right when I saw it.

The temple is special for many reasons. This particular statue of the temple was right on top of our wedding cake. I loved finding a special place to keep it in our house.

**Random side note about our wedding cake that applies to my celiac disease: About six months after our wedding, something happened to our freezer. This caused the top of our cake which we had saved to be gross and it needed to be thrown away. I was a little sad about it. People would tell me, "It's okay, you just take a bite, it tastes like the freezer and then you throw it away." I would think, "I know! But, I want to have that experience!" ;) Well, anyway, it was a few months before our 1st anniversary that I found out I had celiac disease. So, I wouldn't have been able to eat the cake anyway. Turns out it was a blessing in disguise that we had to throw it away earlier!**

Sometimes I wonder what people think when they see our front room. Are those sprinkles in a jar? Yes. Yes, those are sprinkles in a jar and yes, that is a Lego Princess castle.

Again, what does this have to do with my anxiety/depression blog? I am striving to fill my home with things that make me smile. I am striving to make my home a happy place for myself, Jordan, and others.

Again thanks to this blog for inspiring me to be fearless in decorating.

To read more about our blue wall, click here.

Our BRIGHT Blue Wall

Remember my goal to decorate my family room? Well, the process is going pretty well! After looking at this DIY blog, I was encouraged to be fearless in my decorating. So, my wall really speaks who I am.
First, we painted the wall BRIGHT blue. It's awesome. Next, I decided to add some things that make me happy...

• I got the cute umbrella printable on this blog. It says the classic quote, "Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain." I LOVE rain. And, I love the quote. Win-win! 
• I got the cute "Love You" printable from this blog. (What would I do without pinterest!?)
• The America printable came from this blog (are you tired of links yet? I hope not! I just want to give credit where credit is due!) When I was thinking of things to hang up, I really wanted something that expressed my love for America. I feel so blessed to live in this country and I pray God will bless it. (and I know He does!)
• Elsa and "Let it Go." I know some people are sick of this movie/song, but I don't think I ever will be. I found so much in the movie that I love and wanted it displayed somehow in my home. "Let it Go" for me is sort of like a personal anthem. (Read about it here.)
• The little bird on the bottom left is actually a thank you card from Trader Joe's. I thought it was darling (and I have some other birds in my decorating...some people mock me...but I like them!) .
• The cute Minnie and Mickey cartoon says, "You make me happy." It is a really sweet drawing, and it makes me think of Jordan.
• Last, but not least...what is that big square in the middle? It is a map of Disneyland, with our tickets on the side. I love Disneyland! When we went there with my family, we had a blast. I thought this was one way to help me remember what a fun time we had as a family. 

Now you might be thinking, "This is an anxiety/depression blog, not an interior design blog! What does this have to do with anything?" Well, I want my room to be filled with things that make me happy. These are some of the simple things that bring a smile to my face and help me feel less anxious about life. They remind me to be happy and to not take life too seriously. So, I guess I would just encourage you to surround yourself with things that bring a smile to your face, even if they are a bit out of the ordinary.

Singing the National Anthem: (New Year's Resolution...check!)

If you remember, I had a New Year's Resolution to perform somewhere. I wasn't sure where, I just wanted to do it.

About a week ago, I received an email that was sent out to all the teachers letting us know there would be an assembly coming up. A thought popped into my head..."Maybe I could sing the National Anthem at an assembly sometime..." Then, of course, I started to doubt myself. The new thoughts were, "I'd probably forget the words," "It would be dumb to ask," "I'm brand new here, would people think I'm crazy?" "I'd be so nervous!" Then, I thought of this quote from the movie/book, "We Bought a Zoo,"

“You know, sometimes all you need is twenty seconds of insane courage. Just literally twenty seconds of just embarrassing bravery. And I promise you, something great will come of it.”  

I decided I could have twenty seconds of insane courage. So, I sent an email to the teacher over the SBOs. I said,

So, I’m a little shy about this, but I thought I would email you. I’m not sure how you choose to do people for the national anthem, but I thought I would volunteer if you ever need anyone. If you don’t, no worries! I just had a new year’s resolution to perform somewhere and thought this might be a chance.

Thanks so much!

I seriously cringed while I sent it. I don't know why! I just didn't want to seem too forward or anything. But, I sent it with my "twenty seconds of insane courage," and believe me, I felt like I had "embarrassing bravery." The teacher emailed me back, said she loved the idea, and that she would talk to the officers about it. I felt a little better, but I was still shy about it.

A couple days later, a student came into my room to ask if I would sing it. With excitement and slight hesitation, I said, YES.

The performance was yesterday. Seriously, I know it wasn't a huge audience or anything, but I love singing for people. I felt really good about it, and it was so fun. I have a passion for America and for singing, so it was a perfect thing for me. And...it was REALLY fun! (I love microphones).

A big realization I had was that I would never have been able to do this a few years ago. My anxiety would've been too much. Not even necessarily about singing, but about life in general. The idea to volunteer to sing wouldn't have even crossed my mind, because it would've been filled with fears about anything and everything in life. I still deal with it, but I am learning to live with it so much better

I am so grateful I had the opportunity to sing and that this simple quote helped me to achieve one of my new year's resolutions.    

God Bless

Ever since I was young I've had instilled in me a deep love for my country. Events like what happened in Boston yesterday make my soul ache. It is beyond any of my understanding why anyone would choose to deliberately put other people in such pain.

On my way to school yesterday, the country radio station I was listening to played, "God Bless the U.S.A." as a dedication to those suffering in Boston. As I drove to school today, I saw a beautiful, huge American flag flying at half mast. I watched it blow in the wind and now, I think about all the things that have happened to make it possible for that flag to be there. Many wars, Presidents, laws, disagreements, speeches, and tragedies. 

After a tragedy like yesterday, some might be tempted to ask, "Does that star spangled banner still wave?"

It does, at half mast at times, but it keeps waving "o'er the land of the free and the home of the brave." 

  Our prayers are with those in Boston. God Bless the U.S.A.

Why Me?

In dealing with anxiety/depression, there have been times when I have thought, "Why me?" It can be scary to not know if you are going to be able to control your emotions at a certain point or wonder why you can't seem to think straight. It can be embarrassing to go through a panic attack or try to explain to someone how you are feeling when you don't understand it fully yourself. It can be hard to feel like you are the only one, or that you are going crazy and there is nothing you can do about it.
I realized the other day, that I think part of my anxiety may be triggered by the fact that I am so passionate about so many things. I love my family and friends, I love my religion, and I love my country. I am sometimes shy, but I am very passionate and opinionated about these things. When I feel out of control or worried someone I love is hurting, it is almost too much for me. When I let myself feel like I am not good enough, it can bring me way down.
I've thought about it, and even though I deal with anxiety and depression, I wouldn't take away my passion for the things I love in order to get rid of my struggle. I would rather have some ups and downs along the way than be an emotional stone. My passion for the things I love make me who I am. As I go through out my day, I try to remember that God knows me and He has a plan for me.

Quite possibly the most patient man in the world...and his crazy wife ;)

Vote!

I love America. I have been on pins and needles all day waiting to hear what the results of this election will be. Jordan and I discussed today that it is in God's hands now. Whoever is supposed to win will. 

God Bless America!

Malala

I work as a tutor at a nearby Junior High School. I have really been enjoying my job. On Thursday, I helped a student read an article and answer some questions about it. The article was about a young girl from Pakistan named Malala Yousufzai. She has been targeted and even shot just for speaking up about women's rights in Pakistan. As I was reading this to the student, I tried to explain to him how grateful we should be to live in America. I was touched by how seriously this student took the article and what we were talking about. He is usually a little outspoken and could be considered a "class clown," but as we were reading and talking about the article, I saw another side of him. It reminded me how grateful I am to live in America.

America

Just a quick political announcement, then we will get back to regular posts. :)
I know people are tired of hearing about politics. I just wanted to post this video. I love America. It is my opinion that Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan would be a wonderful team in the White House. If you don't agree with that, that is okay! I just wanted to do what I feel is my part in sharing how I feel about the election and our wonderful nation. Thanks!!

P.S. Please keep those anticipating Hurricane Sandy in your thoughts and prayers.

The Election

I am extremely passionate about America. I love this country. I learned some of this passion from my sister. She is posting on her blog every Saturday until the election why she is voting for the candidate she is. If you are like me, politics can cause you some major anxiety because it can be so confusing. My sister's blog is very well written and completely unoffensive (no matter who you are voting for). If your vote is decided or undecided, and you have a minute, take a look at it.
The election is 22 days away!
To get to her blog, please click here.

Remembering September 11, 2001

God Bless America!